The Easy Way Out
by ncbx
Summary: Puck finds himself at the end of his rope when he starts a secret relationship with Principal Figgins


Figgins looked up from his stack of seemingly unending papers when he smelled it. Sue's rage. Over the years Figgins learned how to tell when an angry Sue was about to barge in his office, even before the screams and locker bashings began. Her unending desire for revenge smelled like hot kimchee. And occasionally toothpaste. He sighed and pretended to work on the papers that he would never finish anyway; pretending not to notice the angry cheerleading coach storm down the hall. And sure enough, he heard people being flung against lockers, and the screams of poor, innocent children. Sue was coming. She slammed open the office door, and pushed Puck in front of her, so that he stumbled onto Figgins' desk; knocking the useless papers to the ground. Figgins sighed once again and looked up at Sue; bursting with every kind of mad describable. "What is the problem, Sue?" Figgins inquired. But he knew what the problem was. It was Puck. It was always Puck.

"I found this horrible, disgusting sewer rat stealing leg warmers for MY Cherrios!" She spit on Puck's head. "I say he should be expelled. Or hanged!" Sue cursed several times in colorful tones, not even attempting to make it under her breath. "How can my Cheerios win without warm legs? This is an outrage!"

"I will handle it, Sue." Figgins looked sternly at Puck. "This young man is in for a LOAD of trouble. You may go, Sue, I'll handle it from here."

"No," Sue sneered. "I want to see the look on this ugly," she turned Puck around; spitting in his face every word, "disgusting, abominable piece of monkeys' butt-hairs' face when he sees the HORRIBLE punishment waiting for him."

"Sue, Sue, SUE!" Figgins tried to cut in. "You have work to do! Leave! I promise you this troublemaker will not leave without a punishment!"

Sue looked at Figgins for a minute with a piercing stare, trying to unnerve him, and when it didn't worked she just scoffed and threw her hands up in defeat. "Fine," she sneered. She then stormed out of the room, viciously clashing Figgins' poor, mistreated door against the wall.

"Noah," Figgins blankly stated while closing all the blinds to his office, "you have GOT to stop getting in trouble! I'm scared enough already about our secret…"

"Babe…" Puck confidently strutted up to Figgins and skillfully grabbed his waist. "Don't be." Both caught in the moment, they began to make out by the blinds. They did their best not to make a sound, but Figgins couldn't help letting out a giggle every now and then. The first time they kissed, Puck was surprised by the amount of tongue Figgins used. But now, months later, he found it to his liking.

Figgins slowly pulled away from Puck's grasp, doing his best not to give in again. "You are still in trouble. You know that, right?"

"Whatever." Puck smiled and stroked Figgins' cheek. "You know I don't care." As they continued their business, Puck began to think. Like he always did when he was making out with an old, Indian man. Well, it's happened more often than he's liked to admit. Something about Figgins left Puck coming back for more. He's even begun stealing leg warmers just so he could get into Figgins' office. Is that what withdrawal feels like? And why… Figgins of all people? Puck could have any girl, or even guy that he wanted. So… why did he want Figgins? This idea always trumped Puck logic. Why was kissing him so different? Was it the thrill of adventure; sneaking away hidden kisses in a forbidden relationship? Maybe. But Puck also felt like there was something more. Something… warm and fuzzy. Something he didn't want to let go. And it made Puck slightly sad when he wondered if Figgins felt the same way. Was He just in it for the fun? Adventure? Or… was it something more for him too? Puck didn't dwell on it. He could never handle this stuff well. Instead, he took comfort in the gentle abode of his principals' mouth. And then he got to thinking again. He couldn't help it; Puck would really rather prefer to loose all of his thoughts and enjoy the moment, but everything about this was so confusing. Take for example: Puck always considered himself straight. He'd look at Kurt's weird face expressions, or Blaine's stupid bow- ties, and he'd laugh at their stupidity. Puck always thought that admitting you were gay was like saying, "I'm special and different and my opinion counts more because I like people of my gender. And if you don't take my advice; you're racist." And Puck had never found a guy he thought was hot. Although, he had high standards since he looked in the mirror every morning. And don't get Puck wrong; he did NOT find Figgins hot. But something inside of Puck found him entrancing. Puck shook his head and tried to get all these stupid thoughts out. He wasn't ready to deal with this. He wouldn't ever be ready to deal with this. So he didn't. He whisked away all of his problems and tried to loose himself in the moment. Just like he always did. Puck began to clear off Figgins' desk, but Figgins stopped him.

"Not today, Noah," Figgins took a hold of Puck's hand. "It's too risky here. Remember that time we almost got caught by the janitor? Not here. Not at school. Anyway, you should leave. We can't diddle- daddle all day long." Figgins straightened up his suit and pretend it never happened, just like he always did. "You have classes, and I have work. You can go."

Puck began to reach for the door, until Figgins interrupted him.

"Oh, you have detention for the next week. Because of your shenanigans."

Puck didn't turn around. "Right, yeah." He tried to say in a casual tone, although it came out as annoyed. He opened the door and tried not to slam it, but it ended up crashing against the wall anyway. Fuck. Shit. Puck tried to look casual, but he was so caught up in his thoughts that a weird sneer arrived on his face. He felt someone patting him on the back, and he looked around to see Sam; smiling wider than ever thought possible.

"So…" Sam tried to butt in. "You got in trouble again with Figgins. You were in there for a while; is he your GIRLFRIEND or something?"

Puck really wanted to say, "Fuck yeah, so back off bitch!" or, "So what? You wish you had him…" or even just punch Sam in his trouty mouth smirk, but Puck sheepishly bit his tongue and made out the words, "I would rather die…"


End file.
